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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27558478">When Hearts Collide</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/abnegative/pseuds/abnegative'>abnegative</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>SEVENTEEN (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, HowoonderlandFicFest, Light Angst, M/M, hwff</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 19:07:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,421</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27558478</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/abnegative/pseuds/abnegative</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>This is part of the Howoonderland Fic Fest contest</p><p>The mystery prompt I received was:</p><p> </p><p>While everyone around them is getting together, Soonyoung and Jihoon found their relationship falling apart.</p><p> </p><p>Thank you to the organisers</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kwon Soonyoung | Hoshi/Lee Jihoon | Woozi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>139</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>HOWOOnderland Fic Fest</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>When Hearts Collide</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p3"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p1"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He wasn’t sure what he was expecting but what he found was expected. The apartment was empty, a study in shadows, a picture painted in silence.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">The single bulb illuminating the kitchen was the only light Soonyoung could see.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He could barely move, his thighs burning with exertion, screaming at him to rest. He’d danced long and late and come home well past dinner time. His stomach growled and he moved carefully through the dark apartment so he didn’t wake him. He opened the fridge and took out some cheese and butter, spreading thick slices of bread for a late and lame dinner of cheese toasty, trying not to feel hurt at the empty takeaway container in the rubbish bin.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Once upon a time, a long time ago, Jihoon would have waited up for him. He would have ordered enough for the both of them and stayed up in the living room until Soonyoung came home from the dance studio. They would eat on the floor, containers strewn across the coffee table, laughing around mouths full of noodles and meat and the little bowls of white rice Jihoon could demolish in seconds.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Once upon a time he would have come home earlier thought. He wouldn’t have stayed so late at the dance studio, putting his priority in his new choreography, enjoying the company of the other dancers. A long time ago Soonyoung would have come home in time.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p4"><span class="s3">≻</span><span class="s4">─────</span> <span class="s3">⋆✩⋆</span> <span class="s4">─────</span><span class="s3">≺</span></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Soonyoung hyung!” The leggy dancer named Minghao waved him down. “Hyung!” he called out from across the road and Soonyoung slowed down to wait for the other dancer to catch up with him. “You seem happy,” Soonyoung could help but notice and comment, the tall dancer’s pointed ears flushed pink and his nose shiny from the run. “I am,” Minghao bubbled excitedly as they walked together towards the studio. “I’ve decided I’m finally going to do it. I’m going to ask out Mingyu. On a date. A proper date.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Wow, that’s huge news!” Soonyoung grabbed Minghao’s arm happily. He’d been listening to the dancer’s endless gushing over the tall model for a month. He’d never seen anyone crush so hard on another person and he knew how much Minghao battled with his self-confidence. “Yeah, I’m terrified,” Minghao laughed nervously. “Actually, I need your help, with some ideas.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Ideas?” Soonyoung echoed as they walked through the glass doors and into the studio. “Yeah, dinner ideas, something especially romantic.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Soonyoung couldn’t remember the last time he shared a romantic dinner with Jihoon. All he saw in his mind was empty takeaway containers in the trash and empty rooms when he came home at night.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Should I take him to a restaurant? There’s a nice one down the block.” Soonyoung shook his head. “You know what would be really cute? Pick up some takeaway and a big blanket and have a picnic. You can go down to the river or drive out to the beach or even on the hill overlooking the city. It’s beautiful up there at night with the stars overhead and the city lights below.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Thanks hyung that’s a great idea!” Minghao bounced on his heels and practically skipped down the corridor to the other dance studio. Soonyoung envied him. He wished he still felt that kind of magic; the kind where everything was shiny and new.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p4"><span class="s3">≻</span><span class="s4">─────</span> <span class="s3">⋆✩⋆</span> <span class="s4">─────</span><span class="s3">≺</span></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Morning light danced across the walls in speckled splatters of white and gold and grey. Soonyoung opened his eyes and blinked before realising that, even though he went to sleep alone, he was waking up with Jihoon beside him. Sometimes his boyfriend forgot to come home, so embedded in his work, completely oblivious to anything but the new album he was working on. Sometimes he stayed awake all night, sometimes he caught a couple of hours on the couch in his studio, sometimes Soonyoung didn’t see him for days.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Once upon a time, a long time ago, Jihoon would have woke him when he came in. He would have melted the sleep away with his blazing touches and extinguished Soonyoung’s dreams with his lips. He would have slid his naked body in behind him, kissed him and touched him, and with his sensual fingertips chased the darkness away.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Now he slipped in like a shadow and Soonyoung slipped out just the same. A long time ago he would have woken Jihoon with urgency, pressing against him, splaying wide open and giving up himself freely. Now, he carefully crept from the bed, making sure he didn’t wake him. It was easy; there was an ocean of sheets filling the wide space between them and Soonyoung didn’t know how to swim.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p4"><span class="s3">≻</span><span class="s4">─────</span> <span class="s3">⋆✩⋆</span> <span class="s4">─────</span><span class="s3">≺</span></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Hyung!” Soonyoung was just leaving the café with a self-indulgent frappe when he saw Hansol trying to catch up. “Thank God I ran into you,” he said a little out of breath. “How’s the recording going?” Soonyoung asked the young rapper who was working on the album with Jihoon. “Its going well, Jihoon hyung said we’re almost done, can’t wait!” he smiled brightly as he fidgeted in front of Soonyoung. “Actually, do you have time to help me with something? I’ve been so busy working on the album I feel really bad for Seungkwan. I want to surprise him with some flowers to try and make up for it.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Tears pricked at Soonyoung’s eyes. The long lonely nights and cold empty mornings had been a fixture in all their lives for months. Once upon a time, a long long time ago, the end of recording was a celebration. Jihoon would be incandescent with excitement, ablaze with pride, ready to give his work out into the world and nestle down to hide away from it.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">But while Hansol was out here on the street trying to do something about saving his relationship Jihoon was happy to let theirs fall apart. Those days seemed so long ago.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“What do you need?” Soonyoung blinked quickly and Hansol pulled his arm. “Come into the florist over here and help me pick some flowers.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">The heady aroma was almost overwhelming as they wandered around and looked at the beautiful selection. “Just get these,” Soonyoung pointed to a ready-made bouquet tied with a blue ribbon and Hansol shook his head. “Hyung, come on, would that be enough for you to forgive?”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Soonyoung wanted to break down. Anything would be enough for him to forgive. Anything, a dandelion plucked from the roadside, one of those cheap half dead posies always sitting in black buckets at convenience stores, a paper daisy wild and whipped by the wind in clutched and trembling fingertips. Anything would be enough; any indication that Jihoon wanted to make things work.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">His eye was drawn by a bright orange hue almost glowing in it’s radiance. “Wow,” he reached out as Hansol watched him in silence. “That’s a Tiger Lily, very exotic, very expensive…” the florist said as she noticed his interest. “They’re beautiful,” Soonyoung said as he swallowed his feelings. He’d give anything to feel the rush of being surprised with a huge bouquet.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Not for Seungkwan though,” he turned to Hansol, “maybe these peach roses?”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p4"><span class="s3">≻</span><span class="s4">─────</span> <span class="s3">⋆✩⋆</span> <span class="s4">─────</span><span class="s3">≺</span></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“That’s beautiful,” Soonyoung said when Junhui stopped dancing. “Do you think?” he panted as he grabbed a towel and dabbed delicately at the fine line of sweat on his hairline. Soonyoung always envied Junhui’s perfection; the man even sweated prettily.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Its really lovely,” Soonyoung handed his friend a water bottle. “You convey your emotions so well when you dance.” It was true. Junhui was an open book when he danced, light and lithe, all long graceful limbs and elegant lines and expressive emotions writ across handsome features.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“I’m planning on having it filmed and dedicating it to Wonwoo. I couldn’t think of anything else to give him and its almost our two year anniversary.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Soonyoung knew.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Junhui and Wonwoo had first gotten together at his and Jihoon’s five year anniversary dinner. Next week would make it seven years and he wondered if this was their last.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He felt jealousy, boiling and bubbling, filling his stomach with molten lead. Wonwoo was a talented linguist and he had no doubt Junhui’s beautiful dance would be reciprocated with sweet words elegantly crafted into romantic declarations.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Once upon a time, a long long time ago, Jihoon’s most beautiful words were a melody whispered in Soonyoung’s ears. He yearned for a time when Jihoon would bless him with sweet words, whispered under the cover of darkness and soft sheets where love was born. Words that tangled in his hair like the threads of fate which drew them together and bound their hearts collided.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p4"><span class="s3">≻</span><span class="s4">─────</span> <span class="s3">⋆✩⋆</span> <span class="s4">─────</span><span class="s3">≺</span></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Instead all he found was the cold vacancy of an empty apartment again.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">The creak of the door echoed like madness as he walked inside. It was early but he’d hoped Jihoon would have left the studio abandoned in search of the warmth of home. His heart hammered like a beaten drum as he checked the kitchen and the living room, finally the bedroom, finding nothing but space and silence.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He checked his phone and for a second his hope built but when he read the text it was three little words. Not the ones he craved, not the ones he hoped for, not the words that could sooth his pain like a healing balm.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3"><span class="s2">He wanted nothing more than </span> <span class="s5">“<em>I love you</em>”</span></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3"><span class="s2">All he got was </span> <span class="s5">“<em>Don’t wait up”</em></span></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He ordered a pizza and kicked his shoes off to settle in for another night alone on the couch.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p4"><span class="s3">≻</span><span class="s4">─────</span> <span class="s3">⋆✩⋆</span> <span class="s4">─────</span><span class="s3">≺</span></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">It seemed so long ago.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Seven years,” Joshua murmured as he crept subconsciously closer to Seokmin. “Yeah,” Soonyoung stabbed the cream of his frappe with the straw and watched as the holes bled together. One minute it was one, then two, then the holes got too close and soon the whole thing was falling apart. The pile of cream collapsed into the icy drink and he sucked the remainder off the end of the straw.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Have anything planned?” Seokmin asked as his phone buzzed with a text. “No,” Soonyoung couldn’t help the pout that wrote itself in sadness across his face. He wasn’t even sure if Jihoon would remember.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Jihoon wants us to meet him at his studio,” Seokmin murmured to Joshua as he took his hand. “Oh, sorry, he just wants to show us something on the new album....” Seokmin’s face was twisted with guilt as his eyes met with Soonyoung’s.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Once upon a time, a long long time ago, it would have been Soonyoung who Jihoon called to listen to the new album. Soonyoung used to be his sounding board, his muse, the one who got to share in the highs and lows of the production process.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Now he sat alone in the cafe, a shadow of his past self, staring into the crumbling mess of sugar and cream. The fresh faced seventeen year old, so nervous to approach his crush, all trembling hands and innocent eyes and cheeks pink with excitement was a distant memory.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He’d never forget his first day as dance captain, meeting face to face with the captain of the school marching band, immediately seeing his future in Jihoon’s beautiful eyes. He never believed in love at first sight but Jihoon changed everything and he’d never been the same since.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Soonyoung’s friends were Jihoon’s friends. His favourite songs were ones Jihoon had played until he was sick of them. He made his ramen the way Jihoon showed him when they were seventeen and it was all they could afford for a dinner date. His favourite movies were those he’d enjoyed with Jihoon’s hand entwined in his and pieces of popcorn stuck in his teeth. His personality was a patchwork of Jihoon, held together with the threads of their lives, and as he ran along the path to their apartment he felt like if one thread was pulled it would all fall apart.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Once upon a time, a long long time ago, Jihoon was the glue that put him back together.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p4"><span class="s3">≻</span><span class="s4">─────</span> <span class="s3">⋆✩⋆</span> <span class="s4">─────</span><span class="s3">≺</span></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He wasn’t sure why he was here; Seungcheol was Jihoon’s friend, not his. But he’d called and asked for a second opinion and now Soonyoung was stuck here amongst glass cabinets under blazing downlights too bright. “I don’t know Jeonghan that well,” Soonyoung said softly as Seungcheol pointed out various necklaces and bracelets and rings. “Well what would you want if it was you.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Anything, Soonyoung wanted to cry out, anything. It’s the thought that counts and he’d give anything to be thought of. Once upon a time, a long long time ago, Jihoon’s gifts were so thoughtful. Even back when they’d had no money, been broke University students, Jihoon always seemed to come up with something personal and special. It had been so long since he’d been on the receiving end of a personal gift.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Something personal,” Soonyoung pointed out some bracelets in a case, “something engraved with a special message just for the two of you.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Seungcheol’s eyes glowed warm and comforting and he reached out a hand. Soonyoung only realised how touch-starved he was when he wanted to lean into Seungcheol’s casual affection and bury himself in his warmth.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p4"><span class="s3">≻</span><span class="s4">─────</span> <span class="s3">⋆✩⋆</span> <span class="s4">─────</span><span class="s3">≺</span></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">When he unlocked the door to an empty apartment again he didn’t even bat an eyelid. Solitude was his new constant companion and he was adept at dancing this new dance solo. He knew the album was finished and Jihoon was just putting the final touches. There’d be a big wrap party tomorrow at their company, Soonyoung would be expected to attend, despite Jihoon not inviting him.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Seungcheol had chatted animatedly about how this album was Jihoon’s best work and he wanted to be happy, tried to show enthusiasm, but he felt so empty inside. Emptier than the apartment swathed in silence without even an empty pizza box to fill the gaps.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p4"><span class="s3">≻</span><span class="s4">─────</span> <span class="s3">⋆✩⋆</span> <span class="s4">─────</span><span class="s3">≺</span></p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He dressed as nicely as he could. He selected his best leather pants that hugged his hips in all the right ways, tucked in a sheer shirt that was transparent at the right angles, added a wide belt that nipped him in at the waist. He styled his hair and added a light lick of eyeliner and a smear of strawberry chapstick.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">This might be their last night together and Soonyoung could at least look his best. The death of his relationship seemed entirely unavoidable; he could at least be ready for an open casket.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He jogged down the stairs and met Joshua at the door. “Ready?” his friend asked and Soonyoung climbed into the backseat of his car. “Hi,” he greeted Seokmin in the front seat and they headed in the direction of the record company. Soonyoung was glad to have his friends with him, he didn’t mind third wheeling, even if he had to pretend he couldn’t see them staring wistfully at each other the whole way there.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">When they reached the building and stepped into the elevator Joshua pressed the button for the roof. “Do me a favour,” Joshua said as Soonyoung eyed him suspiciously, “please just hear him out. Give him a chance.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">They stepped out at the twenty third floor and Soonyoung ascended on his own.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">When the elevator opened into the top floor he saw the little metal staircase. It led up to a steel door and when Soonyoung opened it his breath caught in his chest.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He didn’t know what he expected but this wasn’t it. The roof was decorated with little fairy lights, a tent set up to hide them from the cool night air, picnic rugs and cushions strewn casually around candlelight.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He looked nervous, young and a little forlorn, and when he stepped forward and held his hand out Soonyoung decided to take it. “I missed you so much,” Jihoon said as he crumbled, diving into Soonyoung’s chest. “I missed you too,” Soonyoung carded his fingers carefully in Jihoon’s hair and inhaled. Maybe this wasn’t the end after all.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“I never knew if I should save you dinner,” Jihoon stared down at the food he’d laid out on the rug. “You started staying back at the studio so often to eat with Minghao and Junhui.....” his eyes shimmered with a mix of reverence and terror as he lifted the chicken to Soonyoung’s lips and fed him from his own chopsticks. “You could have let me know,” Soonyoung said and Jihoon shook his head making his hair swish around. “You could have let me know too. You never did. You just started staying late and I guess I just stopped coming home.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“I missed your touch,” Soonyoung murmured as he fingered the velvety petals of the vibrant orange Tiger Lily. The arrangement was huge and Soonyoung was smitten with the colours and the scent of fresh flowers in the night air. “I missed yours too,” Jihoon shifted closer and stroked Soonyoung’s arm carefully. His touch was wary and skittish but Soonyoung leaned into it instinctively. He’d missed it so much. “I never wanted to wake you, you always seem so tired from the studio,” Jihoon closed his eyes and let his head drop onto Soonyoung’s shoulder. “I was tired,” Soonyoung turned to press a kiss into Jihoon’s hair. “But I’m never too tired for you and I want you to remember that. Even if you text me and tell me not to wait up.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Jihoon seemed nervous and he pulled Soonyoung to his feet. He was never a man of grand gestures, Jihoon liked to hand his love out in neatly packaged parcels, small and consistent and safe. He reached into his pocket and tapped at his phone and when the song started playing Soonyoung recognised the rich honeyed voices of his friends. “Is this from the new album?” Soonyoung couldn’t hide the tremor in his voice. “No, I wrote it just for you. I-I didn’t trust myself to sing it.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Soonyoung closed his eyes but the tears still fell unbidden. With the world cloaked in darkness Jihoon swept him into his arms and began to lead him around the rooftop in a slow dance that felt like heaven.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s5"> <em>Just promise you'll never change</em> </span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s5"> <em>And I'll always be the same</em> </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s5"> <em>We'll be dancing the same groove</em> </span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s5"> <em>When we're ninety-two, the same as seventeen</em> </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s5"> <em>And I'll never lie to you</em> </span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s5"> <em>Just don't you hold back on me</em> </span>
</p><p class="p2">
  
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s5"> <em>I wanna love you as strong</em> </span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s5"> <em>When we're ninety-two, the same as seventeen</em> </span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">As Jihoon held him close, their bodies warm and hungry, Soonyoung felt his heart slowly pieced back together. Jihoon had always known just how to hold him, how to lead him in the right direction, how to sew closed the gaps left open and gaping in his soul. As the song played out its last refrain Jihoon stopped dancing and wiped the tears from Soonyoung’s cheeks.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“I’ll still love you when we’re ninety two,” Jihoon whispered into the curve of Soonyoung’s neck before tentatively reaching up with his lips. Soonyoung obliged him and met halfway and they kissed like it was the first time.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">The same as seventeen.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“I-I’m so sorry...” Jihoon’s voice was trembling as they broke apart. “I’m taking time off. I’ve told the company I need three months.” He blinked back his own tears as Soonyoung chewed his bottom lip. “I promise I’m so sorry Soonyoung, no more coming home to an empty apartment, no more falling asleep alone-“ “Wait, no, I’m sorry too.” Soonyoung stopped him from going further. “It wasn’t all you. I could have waited up, I could have sent a text....” He didn’t want to cry again.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Three months? Really?” Soonyoung smiled despite his tears threatening to fall and Jihoon nodded up at him.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Wait, I have one more thing.”</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He dug into his pocket with shaking hands and held out the black velvet box. When Soonyoung opened it he had to laugh. It finally all made sense. The bracelet was fine but masculine and engraved on the bar with their initials; LJ + KS. When he turned it over in his hands the back simply said ‘two captains’ and the happiness bubbled up out of Soonyoung uncontrollably.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“As strong when we’re ninety two.” Jihoon was grinning now at Soonyoung’s palpable joy. It was infectious.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He kissed him again slow and sweet and strong. Every single emotion flowed through Soonyoung’s kiss like crystal clear water. He couldn’t write a song, he couldn’t plan a dinner, he couldn’t send their friends on errands all over town.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">All he could do was kiss Jihoon until he knew Soonyoong felt the same way.</span>
</p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p2"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s5"> <em>The same as seventeen.</em> </span>
</p>
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